Week 2: Satan vs the Weatherman

I finished watching the show tonight and then Sam came downstairs and I made him watch some of the scenes with me. We laughed so hard at the guys on the group date in Malibu when they were making the calendar. Craig (the lawyer) in the red shorts was the worst one! The best was when the guys were doing the tug-of-war on the beach and half of them are wearing banana hammock-type bottoms. Hilarious:

Okay, let's talk about Ali for a minute. I think when someone becomes the bachelor or the bachelorette, they immediately have 25 people vying for their affection and they feel like "the shiz." Ali is more confident this time around and I think she looks better. However, there were a couple times when her hair looked terrible--like the evening of the group date. I also hated her gown that she wore on the Vegas date. She looks the best when she wears short dresses. She also does an annoying laugh a lot but all in all, she is growing on me:


I need to talk about Craig with the Hair right away. This guy is Satan. Someone on another website described him as the Michael Douglas/Patrick Dempsey look alike. To me, he is just Satan. Could he be any meaner or crazier? He is a bully and I was so tired of seeing him bully the weatherman. The poor weatherman wasted all of his time with Ali tattling on Satan so he is kind of a bonehead too.

Satan

The Weatherman

Also, could you believe how completely sloshed Satan was when he had his one-on-one with Ali? He couldn't string two sentences together. When it was time to give out roses and Ali was giving them to guys we never even heard speak on the show, you knew she just really didn't want to give one to Satan. I loved it when he went home.

As for Frank. I like him for Ali. He's not the kind of guy I'm attracted to so I feel nothing for him. But Ali definitely likes him and he'll be around for awhile.

Jesse is cute and dumb. His date bored me to death:


Finally, what is up with Kasey's voice. I have to ask. Does the guy have special problems or does he just mumble? It's weird. I predict this guy has some psychotic tendencies:


I like Roberto. He gets cuter all the time:


I still like Chris from Cape Cod but he is a little awkward sometimes. I don't like entertainment wrestler. I can't decide how I feel yet about Ty (the divorced guy who plays the guitar.) What do you all think? Who are your early favorites? Were you all so happy Satan went home or were you hoping to say good-bye to the weatherman?

Polka Dot Party

We sent out invitations for Sammie's birthday party about five weeks ago. Then my water broke before we could actually have the party. Here are the invitations:


I'd like to take credit for them but I was lazy and ordered them on Etsy. I'll probably never make homemade invitations again.

Ever since Buster was born, Sammie reminded me daily that we still hadn't had her party. So this past week, I bit the bullet and threw the party. My mom came and helped me wrestle Ryan and did whatever else I ordered her to do.


What do you think the chances are this kid took a nap that day (after watching us prepare for the party?)

I have to admit that I had the attitude beforehand "just git 'er done" but it ended up being a lot of fun. Five-year-old girls are so easy to please.

The night before the party, I made Sam put together tissue paper balls and hang the polka dot lanterns. He is really good at stuff like that and I'm not. I tried to take a picture of him but he threatened that if I did, he would tear them down:



We had polka dot everything.

Bowls:


Treat bags with Dots candy and other dot favors:


The girls each got a necklace with their initial (I made all of these long before the baby came):


We played Twister:


and musical dots:


And we had a not-so-cute cake from Harmon's but Sammie didn't care.


We even had one little tiny friend in a polka dot tie (thanks for the onesie Heather!)


The party is done and she was happy. Here she is reveling in her loot.

Where Have All the Good Men Gone?

Is it just me or were there some serious dogs on the show tonight? I honestly think there were only a couple attractive men. I, for one, am rooting for Chris from Cape Cod. His deep voice did it for me and who doesn't love a man who loves his (dead) mother? He's my early favorite:


I know don't where to begin so I'll just jump in. There are so many guys and I'm going to forget their names (and I'm too lazy to look them up) so bear with me.

First, Craig with the Hair. You know who I'm talking about. He is totally going to be her Wes. He is charming, and mean, and probably has 3 girlfriends back home:


Next, the other Craig--One of the attorneys. This guy embarrasses me. He should have gone home tonight. I can't stand tattletales. Plus, he's totally not cute. Woof woof:


Speaking of dogs--the other attorney, Jay. I just plain feel bad for this guy. Someone should have told him to cut his mangy hair and lose the tie clip:


I kind of like the weatherman. Sue me:


Frank is WAAAAY too high energy for me. I could take that guy for about 2 minutes. I know it is in vogue to "chase your dreams" but when it involves leaving a well paying respectable job to write screenplays in your parents' basement. I'm no longer interested. Does that make me a bad person? Probably:


The "Entertainment wrestler." I can't figure out why the guys hate him so much. Maybe we aren't seeing everything. Yeah, he has a totally lame profession but I thought Craig with the Hair was way worse. The Rated R tee was a little much:


I was sooo embarrassed for the "outdoorsman." I actually said "Stop!" out loud when he did the fishing thing when he got out of the limo and I was watching the show alone.


Don't get me started on all the crap the guys made or gave Ali. The little yellow shoes--good grief! Super nerdy Kirk and the scrapbook--Ali must have been dying having to look at it.

I actually thought the guy who played the ukulele did a good job but he wasn't cute. Did he go home?


Finally, Shooter--oh my gosh. What was he thinking? I honestly thought "he's not going to go there" and then he did. He'll never live that down.


The best line of the night goes to the guy who got out of the limo and said to Ali "I'm so glad you're not Vienna." That was awesome.

This season is going to be sooo good. Fights, tears, someone has a girlfriend, someone goes to the hospital...I can't wait. What did you all think? I'm kind of missing Ed and Reid right now. Hopefully these new guys will surprise us.

Buster's Photo Shoot

Are you tired of looking at photos of Mitchell? Good, neither am I!

My friend Jen took these photos. Not only is she a great photographer, she has the most beautiful home. I begged her to come to my home and consult me on all things cute. She came yesterday and brought Kneaders and we talked drapes, furniture, accessories, etc. Like a good designer, she listened to what I liked and helped me form a coherent vision for my home. It will take time and money but at least I know exactly what I want to do!

So back to the photos. Without further ado, here are a few pictures of Buster:




















And I thought I wanted a girl...little did I know.

Set the DVR

The Bachelorette starts on Monday night. I, for one, will be mixing up a pan of brownies and settling in to watch Ali in what is sure to be the trashiest season yet.

Will you join me?

I'm Going to Miss This

Everyone keeps asking me if I'm so happy to know I'm done having kids. And the answer is YES! But also a little tiny no. Yes I'm thrilled to never get huge again (at least not through pregnancy, Oreos are another story), I'm thrilled to know that all of my kids are here and they are all healthy, and I'm thrilled that this will be my last sleep deprived year (I take sleep very seriously.)

I can't believe I'm going to admit this but I've also been sad. I first felt the sadness come on at the hospital immediately after I gave birth. It didn't really go away over the next week. I thought it was just the post baby hormones. But now I realize I do think I'm honestly just a little bit sad that I never get to go through the miracle of birth again. And I don't use words like "miracle" lightly. I really do think that the birth process is a total miracle. Every time I give birth, I am honestly surprised and shocked that there is an actual living human being that just came out of me.

I love yawns

I'm sad that I never get to look forward to another 20 week ultrasound to find out what I'm having, I'm sad that I never get to wonder when my water is going to break again. I'm sad that when Buster gets big, I will never get to hold a tiny, furry newborn again and snuggle him. I have always been the type of person who was uncomfortable holding other people's babies. I felt awkward. With my own, it is so natural. I will miss that.

So I'm giving away all of my maternity clothes and all of my baby stuff just so I'm not tempted to do this again. And in a year from now, if I start talking crazy about having another one, someone out there grab me by the shoulders and shake some sense into me. (I know Sam is calling to schedule a vasectomy as he reads this!)

Bad picture, bad lighting, but you can clearly see I have one too many and it's not the baby.

Am I saying I might have another one? No. Absolutely not. In fact, my doctor even told me I'm through. The reality is, with every baby I have from here on out, it will just be more time in the NICU because they just keep coming earlier. If I got pregnant again, I would spend the entire third trimester terrified of how early my water was going to break. But that is not the only reason. I know that my sanity is at stake. And I don't want more kids. I know we are through but I guess I am just saying I will miss this.

Around Here

So I'm sure you all assumed I died since you haven't heard from me since Buster came home. Things are actually going really well and I've just been content to hold him and love on him every second.


Here is what else has been going on...

1. I'm loving Glee. I swear the show was written just for me. I have all the episodes tivo'd and I'm behind so every night I get to watch a show. Were you all dying at the Madonna episode? It was the best one yet. I love the story line with Finn's mom and Kurt's dad dating. And Sue Sylvester is my hero. She is the funniest thing on tv right now. Yet, she is so sweet with her down syndrome sister, I always end up in tears.

2. I know Dancing with the Stars is for old people but I promise I just tivo it to watch Erin and Maks. Are they the cutest couple ever? Do you think they a couple in real life? I'm obsessed with them. This is what happens when I have nothing else to think about:


3. Luke pooped his pants today. Yes, Luke. My almost 7 year old. He was laughing so hard, he pooped his pants. I was soooo mad. I was nursing, and I was yelling at the top of my lungs at him and probably scared the living daylights out of the baby. Now I'm hoarse.

4. The baby is getting some newborn pictures taken in the morning with my friend Jen Fairbanks. She took Ryan's too and they were beautiful. I decided not to wait until 6 weeks like I did with my other babies because my kids are huge by 6 weeks and I want to remember how tiny Buster is right now. He is still 6 pounds and he turned 2 weeks today. Did I mention how cute he is...oh yeah.

Ryan at 6 weeks

5. I am going to be in some of the pictures. Because of some ginorm nursing boobs, I will hopefully just be doing face type shots. I'm too big for all my clothes and Buster is too little for all of his. It's a cruel world.

6. Getting meals brought in is the best thing on the planet. The meals that my friends have brought have made me embarrassed for every meal I've ever taken someone else. I can't figure out why I'm not losing any weight...

7. Sam bought me a new stainless steel Kitchenaid mixer and blender for Mother's Day. I get to say adios to my cobalt blue stuff. This is BIG! One of my biggest regrets in life was buying blue appliances. What the crap was I thinking?

8. I have a good husband. I sent him to Target with a list of feminine type products such as nursing pads and such and he didn't bat an eye. Four kids will do this to a man.

9. I'm kind of wondering how much longer it is acceptable for me to keep tooling around in sweats. Any thoughts? I did get my hair and eyebrows done yesterday so I haven't completely let myself go.

10. If anyone in the greater SL area is reading this, I need a diet coke stat.