I want to apologize for leaving you with the Bachelorette post for 6 straight days. We just returned from a short road trip to Sun Valley, Idaho. We had a great time and that post is coming but for now, I want to lay down my law for road trips with kids.
1. Pack the car to the gills. You are driving, not flying, so you don't have weight restrictions. Milk it. We had so much shiz this time that we borrowed my in-laws car just to make it all fit. We are talking 5 bikes, a jogging stroller, a regular stroller, a bike trailer, all of our luggage, a pack-in-play, inflatable pool toys (fully inflated) and a partridge in a pear tree. It just so happened that our condo was on the third floor. The husband loved hauling it all up two flights of stairs!
2. Bring a bag of good hooch (non-messy, non-chocolate hooch) and a cooler of drinks. You will be stopping at gas stations along the way to get your fountain diet coke and more hooch but these are your staples.
3. Feed said hooch to fat baby in the back for five hours straight to keep him quiet.
4. Buy DVD system for your vehicle. This is non-negotiable. If you didn't have these rules when you were at the dealership--do not despair. The after-market DVD system is even nicer and larger than one that comes with the car.
5. Put your feet on the dash and admire your pedicure. Crank the tunes and make your kids wear headphones for the DVD in the back.
6. Listen to your husband's best rendition of Kenny Roger's "The Gambler."
7. Pull off to the side of the highway when your 4 year old won't stop crying. Pull her out of the car and threaten to leave her there just like your mom did when you were that age.
8. Don't forget to put her back in the car. When any child falls asleep, put the pedal to the metal and drive like the wind. Don't stop for any reason. This is sacred time.
9. Eat at McDonald's for every meal. Justify the large shake because you are on a roadie. Let your kids play in the play land for 1/2 hour. Pray they don't get AIDS.
10. When you see your friends ahead of you on the highway, yell to your 6 yr old to jump into the front seat and prepare to do a "pressed ham" in the window as you pass your friends. I'm just making this up. Who would really do this? Seriously. Expect your 6 yr old to talk about the incident the rest of the trip.
What are your rules for road-tripping with children?