Sunday, May 5, 2013

How to Find the Perfect Pair of Shoes--a Step by Step Guide

Remember my post about finding the perfect snow boots?  That was nothing compared to this. That gave you a glimpse into my shopping insanity.  Over the years, I have developed a new way to shop.  No longer do I go out on an endless browse.  This is how I operate these days:

Step 1.  Decide you have a NEED for a particular item (in this case--bright fluorescent, preferable mango-colored) Nikes.

Step 2.  Tell yourself you will not rest until you find the perfect pair.  Isn't there some quote about the greatest cause of unhappiness is trading what we want most for what we want at the moment?  Don't give in to fatigue and just buy the first pair that looks good.

Step 3.  Get online.   Do a search on Amazon, Google images and every shoe place you can think of.  Order anything that looks decent.  Make sure you use your AmEx card (for miles, duh!) and so that nothing is coming straight out of your account.  Make sure you get free shipping.  Sometimes you have to order extra stuff to spend enough for free shipping.  Do it.  You can always return it. 

Step 4.  Get giddy everyday checking the doorstep for packages.  When you get one, open it like it is Christmas morning--you have no idea what is inside because you ordered so much stuff!

Step 5.  Once everything is here..Lay out the shoes for some photos to post on Instagram.  Get your friend's opinions.

Step 6.  Send photos to your boyfriend at work and make him weigh in on the shoes.  He loves this, I promise.  Then when he comes over, try on all the shoes and work out clothes for him in person.  This is really a test to see if he has the stamina to be considered marriage material.

Step 7.  Fast and Pray.  Just kidding.  But do sleep on it for a few nights.

Step 8.  Tell yourself you are going to narrow it down to one pair.  Then rationalize that you had merchandise credit at Famous Footwear so the polka dot pair was almost free and decide to keep two pairs. (The polka dot pair was a bonus pair anyway--your original mission was to find the Mango pair--remember?!)

Step 9.  Wear the perfect pair to the gym.  Pose with your son in his soccer uniform because he is on a team called Orange Crush and you coordinate with him perfectly.

Step 10.  Return 5 pairs of shoes with one trip to the Post Office and UPS store.

Step 11.  Start looking for more workout clothes to match said shoes especially the polka dot pair you were not originally planning to buy.

There you go folks.  I'm not crazy or anything right?!  Don't answer that.


SewSara said...

Reallllllllly trying to not be jealous of your nice legs right now. You are so skinny and in shape!!

Shoes blah blah blah.... of coirse yoir boyfriend loves the pics!!

SewSara said...

Ps. Where do i find a cute suit for my 8 yr old? You're the shopping pro!

SewSara said...

Oh and i mean boy church suit (max)

Kimberly said...

LOVE the polka dot ones! Ahhhh! I'm dying from cuteness!

brooke said...

Sara, I got Luke slacks and a blazer at Nordstrom. It was pricey but I knew all three of my boys would wear it. I have heard JC Penney and Sunday's Child have good church clothes/suits for boys.

Kimberly said...

I agree w/ Sara...your legs look amazing. I wish I could get those cute trendy nikes. I can't buy running shoes like that. I go to a running store and run on a treadmill and they judge my pronation. I can't remember if I over or under pronate but I do know that the best shoes for my knees/ankles are brooks, and they are not so cute.

Heather said...

You look hot Brooke! I love the polka dot shoes!

Ashley said...

I love the shopping guide--we shop the same way only you do it on steroids and I am much more willing to raise the white flag and sacrifice what I want most for what's in front of me at the moment. I am actually in the market for some running shoes. And yes of course you are hot and of course Cole liked the pics. You would be the complete toast of the Y.

Linde said...

I am in REAL need of new tennis shoes and now I know I've been going about my search ALL wrong! ;) Thank you for the tips...I have used the internet, but I can see now that I have not used it to the full extent possible. (Nor the post office.)

Actually I should just hire you to be my fashion buyer! :)

Your legs look great (all of you does, but that picture with Ryan shows the that!).

Liz said...

Sadly, the way I shop, I would have kept all of them because they are so, so cute and then had total guilt. Love the polka dots. Love the legs. Uber jealous.

Molly said...

This is hilarious. Seriously. And I'm pretty sure that potential-marriage-material guy is looking at your legs, not the shoes... I mean, all of the rest of us are. I need to start going to a gym. ;)

Peggy Newman said...

Brook, I'm testing this out so that I can comment in the future.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, another test

Natasha said...

I have the gray polka dot Nikes too. I love them but feel guilty every single time I wear shoes produced in a sweatshop. If I can find a fair trade sneaker that fits me comfortably then I'll be all over it.

Em said...

"You would be the complete toast of the Y"!!!!! Best line ever.

Love this post. It's given me some good online shopping ideas...thank you!