Monday, August 9, 2010

Bachelor Pad--Adios Juan and Michelle!

Was it just me or did those two hours just fly by? I have so much to say. Here we go.

*The husband is disgusted that I am actually watching the show. He will be mad at me every Monday night. I'm doing this for you people! not really. But I did feel so trashy watching the show. Good thing Chris Harrison is there to give the thing a tiny bit of credibility.

*Twister is bikinis? Heaven help us.

*What is the deal with Satan's pants? They are all too short and he looks like he is wearing ill-fitting pj bottoms with loafers--even on the nice date. He is still Satan in my book and I loved that Elizabeth called him out during twister. I didn't love how she caved and tried to do the "do you want to make out with me" thing to try to get the rose. She bugs big time.

*I feel bad for Elizabeth because she is so madly in love with Kovacs and he doesn't love her back. She's a mess. She is going to ruin both her and Kovacs' chance of winning. I want to buy her the book "He's just not that into you." Kovacs is the hottest guy on the show though. I always wanted Jillian to pick him.

*Along the same lines, the show ain't about love people. The contestants who actually want to find love might as well book their tickets home. It's about the money and it's a game. The best strategy is to lay low and let the drama unfold. The people getting the most attention will shoot themselves in the foot.

*Jesse and Natalie are perfect together because they are both sooo dumb. Remember when Jason Mesnick asked Natalie to tell him something about herself and she told him she liked bears. Classic. Those two are too busy getting busy and neither one will win.

*I loved that Juan went home tonight. I hated his half-hearted apology to Nikki. He is skeazy. However, I don't like Nikki either. She always looks ticked off.

*I also loved that Michelle went home tonight. She didn't go home because of the rumor that Tenley started (which is probably true.) She went home because she locked Tenley in the bathroom and threatened her and you don't threaten the darling of the house.

*I like Tenley but she was driving me crazy as each of the contestants came inside the house for the first time. She was so over-the-top screaming and clapping and hugging each one. We all know she wants Kiptyn. He knows it too.

*I can't look at Dave without thinking of the man-code. He is so buggy.

*Gia has the best chance of the women because all the men want to keep her around just to ogle her.

*I think Krissily is a man. I am baffled at how she was one of the final two on the Charlie season.

*I love the format of the show. I love the three on one dates--much more interesting than a one-on-one. I love the way contestants are eliminated.

Monday nights never let me down! What did you all think? I think my early favorite is Ashley.


The DeVito's said...

It was so trashy I felt like I needed to take a shower after watching it! Michelle scares me, she's evil. I think the Weatherman might win, because nobody thinks he's a threat. Elizabeth bugs and she has WAY too much botox!

SewSara said...

ashley - a favorite? hmmm i dunno about that.
and kiptyn is easily the hottest guy there -- not kovacs or whatever his name is.
elizabeth will be gone pretty soon if she keeps it up ... she's crazy.

it was totally like big brother but with people we "know" ... loved it!

and how the crap old is gwen...??
why wouldn't they put it?
could you please find out for us brooke? :)

Denise said...

I thought it was pretty lame and sleazy. Even some of the camera shots were trashy. Elizabeth is looking really desperate. I thought he should have stayed and Kovacs should've left. He should see how messed up Michelle is and break things off completely with her. He bugs, but I do get that he is probably WAY confused by what she is saying. Does she want him to pretend that he is in love with her? And, how is she in love with him so quickly?

I thought Juan was being more sincere than you did.

(I missed the first 45 minutes, so I'll have to go online to catch up, because this IS the most important thing I have to do today.) I don't want to watch this...I want them to have too few ratings to have another season...but, now I'm hooked. I blame the DOJ, they sent my man out of town last night, so what else was I going to do?

Jill said...

Oh Brooke, only you can get me to read a post about show I would never watch! You're thoughts are hilarious, so I simply must read them.

Is it wrong that I'm disturbed by the stupidity of these names? Seriously, Tenley, Kiptyn and Krissily??! What in the world?

Linde said...

I told myself I was not going to watch it. I mowed my lawn instead to keep me from being tempted. But your update is interesting...makes me curious. :) Thanks for posting!!

Em said...

Amen to everything Jill said! But I gotta add Kovacs to the list, too.

I am so very confused about the premise of the show and how you're supposed to win, other than it looking like a train wreck waiting to happen. But I'll be here every week reading your recaps. (It's thanks to your Bachelor/Bachelorette posts that I know who Kiptyn and the gang are in the first place...)

brooke said...


Kovacs is the guy's last name becauese his first name is Jesse and there are three Jesses on the show. Kovacs is hot and don't be knocking his name.

Each episode there is a challenge activity. The person who wins gets a rose (immunity) and gets to choose three members of the opposite sex to take on a date. On the date, one of the three is given a rose (immunity.) At the end of the episode, one guy and one girl get voted off. The guys each chose one girl to vote off and the girls each choose one guy. Every single person gets a vote. The last person standing wins $250,000. It is sort of like Big Brother meets bachelor, though I really don't think anyone would choose to find love over the money.

SewSara, I bet Gwen is in her late 30s which I don't understand why it is such a big deal. Juan was 37for crying out loud. Nobody cared.

Kat said...

New follower here! love the Bach recaps. Look forward to catching up. And I concur with SewSara...Kiptyn is H-O-T.

Jenn J. said...

Ok, first things first, and brace yourself because I have a lot to say too.

Google tells me Gwen is 39. No shame in that, but the poor girl is playing with a bunch of (mostly)20-somethings. And speaking of, although I don't like Craig/Satan, I do appreciate that he picked Gwen for the date. I'm not sure why he did it, and I'd like to have known why he did. They seemed to address why he picked the other two girls, but never her. Maybe I missed it. I want to believe it's because he didn't think she'd get picked very often and he was being nice, or even that he's genuinely interested in her. But, we all know Satan doesn't think that way.

Elizabeth. She's a mess. First off, she should have NEVER gone blonde. Ever. It's not actually even "blonde," but more of an orangey, gross, not-quite-a-real-color combo. It's gross, and the girl obviously needs a new hairdresser. I hated how she manipulated poor Kovacs. Seriously? You're going to threaten him into telling people he's in love with you? No. I can't believe Kovacs went for that and then seemed genuinely nervous. Elizabeth is seriously ca-razy.

The Michelle thing was nuts and Juan is just not cool. I'm glad those two went home.

Also, I find it hilarious that a bunch of people who once all swore they were on the bachelor/bachelorette to "find love" all talked tonight about how they want nothing to do with it. Oh, how the tables have turned.

I am ashamed not only that I watched it, but that I had this much to say about it but, I can't turn away now.

nicole said...

just have to pop in here to tell you how much i enjoy your recaps...i followed you through the bachelorette and i'm so glad you are back to recap the bachelor pad as well! it is like the cherry on top to read these the next day :)

marta said...

oh my gosh. how did i totally miss the first episode!? i so spaced it this week. we actually had FHE instead. i'm super happy you brought me up to date with this recap. you're the best.

The Mostess said...

I'm with Sam.

Heather said...

I can't's too embarrassing. It may be that I'm afraid that I would act like this if put in a similar situation. Make no mistake...singleness breeds desperattion.

On another note...I had a dream about you Brooke! We drove to Taco Time together. Althgouh it was a strange Taco Time...we put our money in a giant mailbox, circled the block, and then our burritos were inside. So weird...especially since my conscious self would put us at McDonalds getting diet cokes.

Stephanie said...

Okay, I just finished reading everyone's notes and I'm feeling like going to McDonald's for a Diet Coke. ha.

I really thought I'd be skipping this show all together--but I feel like I'm getting sucked in. :) Now I'm curious if I need to watch just one episode of the show. Maybe your blog will be enough for me. I'll have to get back to you. :)