Monday, January 3, 2011

I Wasn't Going to Do This


I told myself I was just going to enjoy the show this season and not do recaps. But if you don't know me by now.....I always have something to say.

First, Brad is FINE. Are people still saying "fine." Whatever, he is hot to trot and I may be the only woman in American who liked what he did three years ago. I applaud his honesty and I wish he would quit apologizing for it. He didn't love either woman enough to marry her. Sue him. He is my favorite bachelor and I'm glad he's back. Who can resist that southern drawl?

It was super lame to waste our time bringing back Deanna and what's her name. I'm glad Deanna isn't holding a grudge or anything....

Let's talk about the show. I think the best thing the ladies can do the first night is just look pretty and not do anything stupid. Don't sing! Don't can can with him and holy hell, don't freaking wax the man's arm. Did that girl go home? I don't remember. The girl who sang looks just like Rachel on Glee though. And Fangs girl looks like Michelle Williams and that's not a good thing.

Speaking of "Fangs"--What the? Is anyone else completely freaked out by this? The teeth were bad enough, but she seemed slightly stoned or something and manly. I couldn't believe he kept her and was "intrigued by her."

I liked the gal who got the first impression rose. She was really cute and sweet. Forgive me right now because I don't know anyone's names and I'm way too lazy to look them up.

I also liked the southern belle with the dead fiancee. I think she runs events for a children's' hospital or something. I predict she is in the final four.

Renee is an idiot. She shouldn't have kept forcing herself on Brad. If he wanted more time with her, he would have come and gotten her. I was embarrassed for her. Same with girl in the green dress who asked Brad if her bum was too big for him. How awkward did she look sitting there on the couch after Brad walked away? Cringe.

Michelle from Salt Lake. What do we think folks? I don't some of you know her. The jury is still out for me. I know I should be rooting for her but I don't know. I'm going to give her some time. I did like her dress. It was a nice departure from all the prom looking numbers.

Okay, finally, I'm so embarrassed for the girls who leave the first night either pissed off or in complete tears. It is the first night people. You don't even know the guy! Stop planning the wedding and talking about how you know you'll find true love eventually. Leave with dignity! If I were you, I wouldn't even do an exit interview.

Did you see the preview of the upcoming season. Holy crap I'm giddy. Cat fights, exotic locations, Brad chasing down a limo....Fleiss has done it again.

BTW, you all should go back and read Sam's comment on my Christmas memories post. He is funny.

This post took me 8 minutes to write. Forgive me for poor grammar. I'm out!

Thanks so much to my extremely talented friend Heather for providing my amazing new blog header!

23 comments:

Ashley said...

I knew you'd be recapping. You can't help yourself. But I'm glad. I watched while I sorted through a ginormous duffel of girl clothes so I don't know names either. My biggest beef was how B-Rad kept apologizing for not loving Deanna. It made him a little too approachable and I like him best when he's hot and mysterious. I feel bad for all the girls who got cut and thus lost out to the vampire. That's bad.

LAURA said...

I agree with everything. I love Brad. I wouldn't have even known this was on if it wasn't for you and your sisters post. I can't believe he kept the girl who slapped him. He shouldn't have kept apologizing. Fang girl was crazy, points lost for him.

It looked like the beautiful blonde left him at the finale...do you think that was just a cover?

leandparkermakes3 said...

Brooke,
You must recap this season! I love reading what you have to say! First of all, fang girl? What is he thinking? Did you see him try to bite his neck when he gave her the rose? She's crazy. Second, from what I have heard about SLC girl, I don't trust her. She told him she wants someone honest? Hmm....she should take her own advice. I like the Southern Belle too. She is my favorite so far.

marta said...

i had a new year's resolution not to watch the bachelor. but then the orange bowl had so many commercials, i just had to take a peek. dan said, 'i have a feeling you'll be watching this every monday night.'

i guess, if i have his blessing...

love that you're back on board with the bach. i agree with everything you said. i totally think he has signed some contract saying HE WILL CHOOSE A GIRL. of course, then they won't last. i mean, come on people. what do we think this is?! how much money did he get to do this again?! but yeah, the teaser has me totally excited.

Linde said...

So glad you are recapping!! Yes, I wateched last night too and could not believe he kept fang girl!

Loved Sam's comments about Christmas---especially the one about returning the lobster. SOOO funny!

You asked about Jacob's train set. I got it at Lakeshore Learning on 700 E. and about 5400 S.

Sarah said...

You've gotta re-cap. They are as good as watching the show. So agreed with everything you said. Adam when to high school with Michelle and says she's so nice. We'll have to see how her personality comes out on tv.

brooke said...

Ashley, I was going to say the same thing. I like Brad better cocky and cool. The apologizing is ruining him!

Denise said...

I can't get a read on SL girl. She's either really cool and confident or totally psycho, time will tell. And, really, Fangs?...she's got to go.

I think Brad is super cool. More guys should go to therapy and be down with it...Jimmy, are you listening???

Oh, I had a dream that our families went on a vacation together. It was super fun.

Stephanie said...

Emily will for sure be in the final 4 if not the final 2. When she first came on I got chills with her story. So I immediately fell in love with her. The girl who got the first rose was cute too. Not sure about the girl who slapped him in the face. I was a little bummed she was staying another week. I think the slap was planned by the producers to be honest.

And Brad runs after a Limo?????? How did I miss that part. So excited to see what that is about!!

Heather said...

I should probably watch instead of just reading the recaps...sadly, I find it horrifying and I keep thinking of things I've done in my 34 years of singleness that are definitely cringe-worthy, but thankfully, not viewed on national television.

Mandee said...

I LOVE you for this.

Linda said...

I agree w/ Stephanie. . .the slap was a producer's ploy--and for crying out loud, those girls knew ahead of time that it was Brad. duh. Also, he's keeping psycho-fang-woman just for the drama. They have to keep a couple of the ones we all love to hate.
Thanks for the recap, Brooke, My sentiments exactly. I would love it if Brad didn't pick anyone again!

Ashley said...

Oh my gosh, I love the new header!

Heidi said...

Heather's header is awesome! You ate right, Sam's comment is great. I think you two should make it a habit to post together. Nothing is funnier than your responses to each other! Does it appear that your kids have inherited your wit? If so, I could be completely entertained by watching life at your house!

SewSara said...

i had to read this out loud to my husband because I kept chuckling. (he watches with me - he knows to not talk too much or i get annoyed). he wants me to let you (or someone) know that he predicts the 1st impression rose girl will win it all.

SewSara said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Laura B. said...

Devestating. For some reason, your blog fell off my reader. Here I was thinking that you were quiet for three weeks. I should have known better!!!
Okay, you know how I feel about Brad. Words can't describe how happy I am that he is back. He is just what I need during these bleak months of Jan/Feb.
I have so much to say, I think I should probably just blog about it.
Stay tuned.

Laura B. said...

p.s i LOVE the new header!!!

nic said...

I am loving the blog heading. I am glad to see you recaping. You know this is supposed to be the most dramatic season ever. Dying at fang girl. Why would you pay for those veneers. Also you don't wax Brad's arm and talk about waxing other parts. Yes I do know Michelle. She looked gorgeous and Brad seemed to think so too. It looks like she has some good scenes coming up in the future. I am not sure I like Southern Belle. I am loving Monday night trashy T.V.

brooke said...

Yes Nic--I believe the term for waxing of other man parts was "Batwings." Holy disgusting.

I also was disappointed that they didn't include ages on the women this time.

Anonymous said...

Word around town is that Michelle from SLC is responsible for Carlos Boozer's divorce.

Amy M. said...

Loved Sam's comments on your Christmas post.

Relevant Notes Blog said...

Haha, this recap is great. I agree about the fangs - really weird!